Wedding Etiquette and Tips

Rsvp Card, Response Card Wording

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Basic Elements of Response Card Wording
  • These are the basic elements of any response, reply, and Rsvp card.

    Basic Elements of Reply Card Wording
Response Card Etiquette

Response card etiquette has evolved over the years and it will continue to do so. Women, historically the social secretaries of their households, would hand-write responses to invitations.  In recent years, this etiquette has changed dramatically.  Currently the most popular method of obtaining guest counts is to send out a response or Rsvp card. 

Though improper, it has become increasingly common to see response cards that offer guests the option to reply by phone, email, or even via websites.  However you choose to do it, be sure to choose a method that both parties are comfortable with.  With the rapid changes in RSVP card etiquette, you are bound to have individuals in your wedding party that have definite opinions on how they wish the response cards to be handled.

Common Questions
  • We need to know what meal our guests prefer, where is this put?While you may have seen some brides do this in the past, it is not proper to do so. Menu selections do not belong on reply cards. Your caterer or restaurant should be able to make an accurate estimate.
  • We have a limited number of guests. Should we add a line requesting a "number of guests attending"?This will help you to obtain an accurate number of guests but it may also encourage more guests to show up than were originally invited. For example if the invitation is addressed to the parents of the household, but the response card asks for a number of guests, they may feel that their children, or others, are invited to attend.
Request Lines

A “please respond by” line is typically included on every response card, though some brides may choose not to include a date on their card, as they feel it might insult guests who know very well when to reply. The request lines may be in either the first two lines of the reply card or in the lower left-hand corner. Most brides ask that their replies be returned 2 weeks before the wedding date.

Guests’ Name

"M" followed by a line for the guest to write in their name(s), should be sufficient in most cases. If your parent(s) and or the bride and groom are doctors, you may wish to omit the "M" as many of your friends will likely also be doctors, as such the "M" will not apply, as they will be using their professional title.

Guests’ Response

The most common response line format is to have the word "will" separated by a line for their response followed by "attend". You may also choose to split the Guest's response line into two lines. "will attend" will be preceded by a line for their response, on the line beneath it "will not attend" will be preceded by its own response line. Either way is considered proper.